How do I stop farting?!?!?!?!?

I ate a bag of pistachios, a bag of dried apricots, and a bowl of chili. My cousin put a LOT of beans, onion, and garlic in the chilly. My stomach now looks like I am 2 month pregnant. I am usually very lean. I keep farting literally every 2 minutes!!! Not like little ones, but huge wet ones that stink really bad. My girlfriend kicked me out of the room...what can I do? I have farted 5 times during the time I wrote this...I am serious about this. No joke answers please!!!